fix stderr locking and ferror semantics in getopt message printing

fix stderr locking and ferror semantics in getopt message printing

if writing the error message fails, POSIX requires that ferror(stderr)
be set. and as a function that operates on a stdio stream, getopt is
required to lock the stream it uses, stderr.

fwrite calls are used instead of fprintf since there is a demand from
some users not to pull in heavy stdio machinery via getopt. this
mimics the original code using write.